The new school-year is just a few days old and many parents are already stressed out. They’re physically and mentally exhausted, and it’s just the beginning. They’re dreading all the lunches that need to be shopped for and packed, all the back-to-to school meetings and conferences to attend, the early morning battles of getting the kids off to school on time, and the late nights studying for tests and working on those special projects.
The kids are stressed too. They still have lots of questions and very few answers yet. Will their teachers be hard, easy, inspirational, or boring? Will they be able to do the all the work that’s required and get good grades? Will they make the basketball team, jazz band, and at the top of their worry list, any new friends?
Once upon a time both parents and children looked forward to the start of school. That was when summer vacation meant long days of unscheduled unstructured time trying to find things to do. Usually it meant riding bikes, playing ball with the kids in the neighborhood or going “back to school” for a few hours each day to do craft projects and meet up with other kids at city sponsored day camps held in school playgrounds.
That was before two-parent working families became the norm and school districts had to scale back on all types of services. Suddenly there were no kids left to ride bikes with or community camps to attend. It was also before big business stepped in to fill the gap with all types of specialized camps which guaranteed they would not only keep children safe and occupied during the summer months, but give them a step-up when they returned to school in the fall.
So now, instead of starting the new school-year rested, relaxed, and rearing to go; most parents and kids are already worn out from a summer that that was jammed with places to be, things to do, and hoping the thousands of dollars spent on enrichment programs and sports camps really do translate into better grades and a place on the team.
This is certainly not the best way to begin the new school year – but is there anything parents can do?
There sure is, but it takes the commitment to make some major lifestyle changes and the courage to actually go through with them.
This is the perfect time to start a new family tradition by beginning the school year with a special family celebration honoring the countless hours you put into raising your children and the work and effort they put into school and extracurricular activities.
And perhaps the best gift you can give at this celebration is making a family commitment to spend more time focusing on the lessons families can teach better than anyone else – building character, instilling family values, learning how to love and appreciate who they and others are; talents and flaws included.
Steps for a Saner School Year
Get organized so rather than frantically running round and always playing catch-up you’ll have time to stop and replenish yourself
- Find a big calendar and hang it in the kitchen (the closer to the refrigerator the better) and down all important dates and deadlines.
- Establish an evening routine to make sure all homework is done and projects on schedule, all forms and permission slips are completed, lunches are packed – and just when that next bake sale will be. It’s no fun running out to the 24 hour supermarket getting the ingredients you’ll need to spend the next two hours baking cupcakes. (That’s actually another parenting lesson altogether and rates a blog of its own).
Steps for a Richer Life
- Smaller Lists – Richer Lives Cut back. Fewer activities mean more pleasure and benefits from the ones you choose.
- Set realistic goals based on each child’s unique needs, talents, and abilities based on what’s best for them and not to fulfill your dreams.
- Keep perspective Your kids aren’t doomed to a lifetime of failure if they get a detention, fail a test, or cut from the team. Sure those things make them sad and cause you embarrassment but knowing they can survive setbacks and come back even stronger is a life lesson that is priceless.
- Plan family times that enhance your lives and fit naturally into your daily routines. Stay away from “mandatory” attendance and a set schedule of special events. Every member of your family is already over-burdened with those kinds of demands.
- Take a few minutes each day to touch base privately with your children. It can be as simple as a knock on a door letting them know you love them and asking how their day went or cuddling together while reading a story. Most important – you’re sending the message that you’re always there for them no matter what.
- In this crazy world all children deserve people who will love and support them unconditionally, where they are safe, unjudged, and accepted no matter what.